This is a question for the younger adults.
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@futurebird @GinevraCat I wonder if people are in roommate situations instead of marriages?
That brings it back to economics IMO.
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That brings it back to economics IMO.
@futurebird @thesquirrelfish @GinevraCat I find amongst younger people there seem to be fewer long term relationships and people wait until late 20s/early 30s to have children.
Also way fewer children for last 20 years, I was in the Maternity Ward building of the general hospital earlier this year (it has 9 floors and is one of the tallest in town so we put up an antenna and installed a new transmitter for the community radio station) and only 2-3 floors of it are now in regular use ..
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@futurebird @thesquirrelfish @GinevraCat I find amongst younger people there seem to be fewer long term relationships and people wait until late 20s/early 30s to have children.
Also way fewer children for last 20 years, I was in the Maternity Ward building of the general hospital earlier this year (it has 9 floors and is one of the tallest in town so we put up an antenna and installed a new transmitter for the community radio station) and only 2-3 floors of it are now in regular use ..
@vfrmedia @futurebird @thesquirrelfish @GinevraCat Wild statistic, but it kinda checks out around here as well. Maternity wards are smaller and according to friends of mine with kids, the level of care/service/time the parent + baby spends in the maternity ward has gone way down as well.
Almost no one I know has kids because childhood in the USA is so miserable (and dangerous) that it's hard to get excited about dooming someone else to it.
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I think the Republicans are mad that their kids avoid them.
All those years of beating their kids because they were supposed to fear their parents and now, they never call. According to Republicans this must be becaue of the woke mind virus, and not say kids aren't economically tied to their abusive parents any more.
@alienghic @futurebird not American but in my (abusive) father's family beating children with belt or stick was seen as normal punishment. I feared him most of my life. And yes, I am basically no contact with my father for almost 9 years. Most time I just pretend he doesn't exist (all my personality is composed of coping mechanisms realated to dissociating from reality).
Economic aspect was so engraved in my subconscious mind I had frequent dreams about screaming at my father "I am finally financially independent and now you couldn't blackmail me!" first several months in my first job. -
@vfrmedia @futurebird @thesquirrelfish @GinevraCat Wild statistic, but it kinda checks out around here as well. Maternity wards are smaller and according to friends of mine with kids, the level of care/service/time the parent + baby spends in the maternity ward has gone way down as well.
Almost no one I know has kids because childhood in the USA is so miserable (and dangerous) that it's hard to get excited about dooming someone else to it.
@sidereal @futurebird @thesquirrelfish @GinevraCat
I have hybrid working and drive to the office in the afternoon, there are noticeably fewer children around (even at school finishing times) and even during summer holidays I didn't notice that many in my street or the surrounding areas). A mutual from Germany said the same thing has happened in his area (and its likely common throughout Northern Europe)
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This is a question for the younger adults. Those in your 20s and 30s. There have been a few surveys and articles about how "young people are having less sex" and "young people aren't getting married"
And then some people will say there is a "loneliness epidemic"
How real is this? Are these things even connected?
There are fewer marriages but also far fewer divorces which, to me, kind of sounds like a good thing?
But I rarely hear about the low divorce rate in this context.
@futurebird I know three siblings in that age range, two of whom are in long term committed relationships, who have expressed a strict unwillingness to get married.
Why? Because their mom was awful and they saw what their dad had to get through in order to get away from her. Now they’re happy, the mom’s out of the picture, and the dad’s free. But it took decades.
I can see why kids witnessing people suffering broken marriages and messy divorces might sour on the idea of marriage.
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@sidereal @futurebird @thesquirrelfish @GinevraCat
I have hybrid working and drive to the office in the afternoon, there are noticeably fewer children around (even at school finishing times) and even during summer holidays I didn't notice that many in my street or the surrounding areas). A mutual from Germany said the same thing has happened in his area (and its likely common throughout Northern Europe)
Come to the Bronx we have kids up to our eyeballs.
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I wonder, if like crime, if you asked people if divorce is a big problem if people would still overestimate it?
The fall in the divorce rate presents a problem for conservatives who want to talk about how "the family is being destroyed" (which family? how?)
But I wonder if people still think that a large number of marriages are ending in divorce.
History sheds light.
No-fault divorce was made legal in most US states by the 70s. Awareness of family ills like abuse was also growing through this time. Likewise, severe social prohibitions against sex before marriage were also dissolving outside of conservative religion.
Hence a divorce epidemic in the 80s, as tons of boomers fled unhappy marriages, the kinds of marriages that their parents' generations were forced to remain in.
As that settled out, we also had the rise of therapy being available and destigmatized. And the availability of birth control got pretty good, along with destigmatizing single parenthood. So people could take their time to know themselves and their partner before sealing the deal. (I'm guessing you'll also see the age of first marriages going way up over this time.)
To the religious right, that's what really destroyed "the family," which was super young sexually repressed horny kids rushing into marriages for the sex or because of pregnancy, then stuck with each other forever because the state would not allow divorce unless they could prove adultry or very severe physical abuse. This type of family was much easier to control by authoritarian religions and workplaces. It stuck men to horrible jobs, and offered up easy victims for the predators of said systems.
And yes, religious and older folks have not updated these stats in their heads. All the social ills of the 80s have only gotten worse in their minds, because their influences have made no effort to correct it. Because those leaders want to go back to a time when a woman and children were their property, and no one pried into their business. This is also what "religious freedom" means to them.
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@alienghic @futurebird not American but in my (abusive) father's family beating children with belt or stick was seen as normal punishment. I feared him most of my life. And yes, I am basically no contact with my father for almost 9 years. Most time I just pretend he doesn't exist (all my personality is composed of coping mechanisms realated to dissociating from reality).
Economic aspect was so engraved in my subconscious mind I had frequent dreams about screaming at my father "I am finally financially independent and now you couldn't blackmail me!" first several months in my first job.I'm so glad that you got away from that.
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Come to the Bronx we have kids up to our eyeballs.
Park slope too. There are 3 other children on just my block born the same month as my daughter
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Park slope too. There are 3 other children on just my block born the same month as my daughter