one time my buddy was running a game of Monster of the Week and I came up with the most mundane character possible: a Wisconsin corn farmer named Pete Faber, competing with angels, demons, and the miscellaneous supernatural

"Okay, tell us about your character." "Hm? Oh... human fighter." "That's it?" "Mm-hm."

Also missing: pure random-roll character who makes no sense and contributes nothing other than needing to be rescued a lot.

And the corollary, overbuilt min-max character based completely on researching the meta for hours but only rolls good at things they're not built to do

6 sessions in and no one has identified/mentioned the person my character is based on, probably because I'm not good enough at doing a Rodney Dangerfield voice

I have done all of these except 13

Sounds like he could be the next Ash Williams who works on over in housewares at S-Mart!

No respect. I tell ya!

My sister always picked those lol just troublemaking groblins

I always do “every non-combat skill, useless in combat”, which is absolutely infuriating with beginner DMs because all they prepared is combat encounters and I have nothing to do Look, if I wanted to fight, I’d go play a video game. I’m here for the part video games *cannot* give me, and that’s talking to a real person and coming up with rube-goldberg solutions to solve problems without shedding blood

haha that's cool [and I'm not a furry](https://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/HaveIMentionedIAmHeterosexualToday)

Sure but what's your TTRPG character?

I actually like point-buy systems where you get better at what you actually use (like in Morrowind). I start at average values in everything and see where the story takes my character.

"What do they look like?" "Middle sliders on the character creator." "Any motivations?" "Do quests to earn money." "How about a backstory?" "Did quests and earned money."

I feel like there should be a “6.1: ***Definitely*** my fursona”

Every party needs one, just to keep the party moving. When the entire party is busy hemming and hawing about how to best approach an encounter, they often need a Leroy Jenkins to just axe-chop the door apart and start taking heads. The real issue is that oftentimes, the heads belonged to the hostages that the party was there to rescue. If the awful little creature had actually paid attention at all, they would have known that. But they were grabbing their fifth beer when that part was explained, (and they wouldn’t have listened to it anyways), so they had no idea who was inside the room.

I've taken more damage from party members trying to get me under control than from the enemy. Now they keep me on a leash.

I can't play with my friend because we play the same guy. Both rogue. Both street tough types rather than the shadowy assassin type. Both used to end up taking a couple of levels of either Bard or fighter and ended up with a swashbuckler. No strength, all dex and cha. We did play together a few times and would swap out which one of us got to play that guy. The other always played a very angry wizard. Just grumpy as shit. Good at a lot of things, but preferred to either fireball or magic missile his way out of situations. Talking to NPCs? I think I've got potions brewing. Must be off! Before we played together we played the same MUD separately. Yep, same character. We ran into each other from time to time. In high school we played at the same place but a couple of years apart. I started going when he left for the Navy. The guy who DM'ed there said my character reminded me of that guy a lot. I want to play BG3 with him remotely and both play swashbucklers.

Being useless in combat is a personal choice that can absolutely be avoided without hampering your ability to be a skillmonkey. You won’t be obliterating the enemy en masse, but that’s what the casters are for. Play a Thief rogue and have a blast with fast hands when initiative is rolled, or be almost any bard and hand out bardic inspiration while you stand as a mild speedbump of meat between the wizard and the enemy. Or maybe chat with your DM about game expectations prior to playing? I know it’s an impossible ask for the internet at large.

> 8. Whatever lets me create the biggest explosions